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Conflict Chat….Handling Intense Emotions and Rage

 
Pattie8Stephen Kotevclark.photo.Got Conflict? If you have a conflict with someone, and are not sure how to handle it, then let us know. Here is your opportunity to ask your question with Conflict Management experts who are mediators, conflict coaches and facilitators on how to think about, analyze or resolve your situation.

Think about it. Are you currently engaged in an active conflict with your co-workers or boss? Ignoring your neighbor because of a conversation you don’t want to have? In a disagreement with your spouse? Or simply afraid to bring up a concern with a friend in fear of stirring up problems.

Discussion Topics:

“When you are emotionally hijacked like in the recent road rage incident and untimely death of NFL football icon, Will Smith, what do we learn about how we handle our intense rage and emotions?”

  1.  Will Smith Death Police Report
  2. Will Smith Death

Factors that Modulate Pain

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Back to School: Building a Bridge of Positive Communication to Create a Positive Learning Process

 

angela woodrowParent, you are your child’s best advocate. Just like painting a room, the more preparation you do the better the result. It may seem like oversimplification when it comes to communicating to your school, especially if it has not always been the most positive process. Separating the facts, emotions, and results can be confusing.

In this program we highlight three free resources that will help you:

  • Gather the facts
  • Organize your information
  • Identify effective ways to communicate with your child’s school /teacher

Knowing your child’s learning style and being able to quantify and collaborate their interest and abilities to what is going on in the classroom is like having cliff notes for accelerated learning. If you are a parent who feels overwhelmed, dealing with the demands of work as well as your child’s school issues this conversation is for you. Angela Woodrow, whom as a coach, provides the opportunity for individuals and the organizations to discover distinctions, maintain focus, and develop and implement action plans. As a life long learner, she advocates for parents and teachers to build the bridge to positive education processes for all.

For more information on this subject check out these sites: Parent Driven Schools, Authentic Happiness, and  Love and Logic

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The 3 C’s of Listening

SusanShearouseListening is a skill. It is an art. It is a discipline. It is hard. It takes attention and practice. It takes awareness. It is particularly hard when you don’t want to hear the person who is talking to you. It is particularly hard in disagreements, arguments, and conflicts. How do we listen without being caught by the judgments, opinions, desires, justifications and stories rumbling around in our heads?

In this session, we will be talking with Susan Shearouse, Frameworks for Agreement. We will explore the 3 C’s of listening: how to prepare yourself and enter a difficult conversation able to hear what is being said, to be able to listen more effectively.

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Addressing the Needs of LGBTQ Youth

 

Stories of attacks on the way home from the bus stop, bullying in the classroom, and assaults in school hallways are all-too-frequent reminders that our community and many others throughout the US are still not safe places for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning (LGBTQ) young people. Perhaps what is most heartbreaking is that some youth have come to believe that this is normal, that this is just part of growing up, or that this is how life is for LGBTQ individuals. SMYAL is working to change all that by providing an inclusive environment and empowering DC-area LGBTQ youth to be leaders and advocates for themselves and their peers in the broader community. We provide youth with the opportunities, support, and skills they need to de-escalate conflicts as they occur and to work within their community to root out these conflicts from their source.

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Conflict Management Tools for Work

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Whether it’s a difficult co-worker, a demanding boss or an angry client, you can learn to handle conflict at work effectively by managing your internal reactions first. Kathi Elster and Katherine Crowley show us how to cool down, then find the words to move a potentially hazardous work situation forward in a constructive manner.  Join Kathi, Katherine and Pattie Porter for a lively discussion on how to apply proven techniques for successfully navigating your most challenging workplace relationships.

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Conflict Chat: From Coconut to Closet Fights

 

Pattie8zena Zumetaclark.photo.Got Conflict? If you have a conflict with someone, and are not sure how to handle it, then let us know. Here is your opportunity to ask your question with Conflict Management experts who are mediators, conflict coaches and facilitators on how to think about, analyze or resolve your situation.

Think about it. Are you currently engaged in an active conflict with your co-workers or boss? Ignoring your neighbor because of a conversation you don’t want to have? In a disagreement with your spouse? Or simply afraid to bring up a concern with a friend in fear of stirring up problems.

 

 

Discussion Topics:

1.  The Massive Mango

2.  Chris Christie Offers a Key to Marital Success: Fight in a Walk-In Closet

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Oooops! We did it again… How To Prevent Hot Disputes from Boiling Over in Your Relationships

Tanski,MaciejYou feel it’s getting hot and you just cannot do anything to prevent the innocent exchange of opinions from boiling over and blowing up like a lump of lava thrown out by a volcano? And it hurts because it happens with people important for you, with whom you have a family, neighbor or work relationship. Join Maciej Tański as he bring some examples of conflict escalation and a handful of tips how to prevent it. We will discover what it takes to keep focused during hot discussions and be aware of the other person’s and our own hot buttons.

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When Dreams Die Young: Stop Youth in Engaging in Gun Violence

 


 

Robert BatistaOur guest and author, Robert Batista will share his passion and journey to curb and stop gun violence through his writing and novellas called Street Angel and The City Game. He will talk about the “iron pipeline” and the collateral impact of gun violence. Gun violence is not the answer to disputes, disagreements, and differences. Robert will discuss non-violent approaches to dealing with these differences and share his stories.

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Organization and Communication – Surefire Ways to Reduce Conflict When Planning Your Wedding

love-1284492_1920Did you know that there are 6,200 weddings a day in the US and that June is the most popular month for weddings in the US? According to Sound Vision’s article on wedding statistics, the average wedding budget is $20,000 with 178 guests attending the event.  Organizing a wedding is no small feat when it comes to communicating a vision, creating a plan and coordinating all of the moving parts including service vendors, bridal parties, family members and guests.

Planning a wedding can be a very stressful process whether you are having a large or small event. There is potential for conflict to arise all the time, particularly between the bride and groom. My husband Bernard and I are newlyweds; we got married in September of 2015, and we had a 200 person wedding in the city of Baltimore.

I won’t sugarcoat anything, despite being the happiest day of our lives, planning a wedding of that size was incredibly stressful and overwhelming at times. However, the one key way I minimized the stress and sidestepped a lot of conflicts resulting from untold details was remaining organized and constantly communicating. On more than one occasion, vendors would say that I was the most organized and communicative bride they had ever met; a title I wear proudly.

Why are organization and communication so important when planning a wedding? 

Unless you are lucky enough to have a wedding planner, chances are the bride and groom (but most likely the bride), are doing the majority of the planning. There is a lot of details that go into making the day the magical one you envisioned. Being able to keep track of everything is necessary to ensure miscommunication and confusion don’t lead to conflicts.

How can brides stay organized and effectively communicate when planning their wedding?

  1. Get a Binder. My binder became my bible during the planning of our event. I had it organized into sections by the vendor; and I included my contract, pictures of what I wanted, etc. from each particular vendor filed in their section. While I know, it may be easier to have everything located on the web somewhere; I enjoyed having something tangible to hold so I didn’t have to sort through my phone to find stuff.
  1. Imagine What You Want. I am a very decisive person so when it came time to plan our wedding I had a very clear-cut idea of what I wanted which I think made things much easier when delivering my vision to our vendors. I know not every bride is like that, so vendors are great resources for sharpening your ideas. However, it important that you go in with some idea for them to springboard off of that way you don’t end up with a theme or colors you didn’t want.
  1. Ask Questions. I had a vendor tell me they felt like they were in an interview when I came to inquire about using their services because I asked so many questions. Before my first meeting with each vendor, I Googled, ” Questions to ask your [ fill in vendor].” I found that I not only covered a lot of ground, but I was able to see if they would be the best fit for the event.
  1. Create an Itinerary. You may think this is a little much, but I strongly recommend sending out an itinerary the week before your wedding to anyone who is involved: vendors, bridal party, readers, etc. The itinerary I created for our bridal party beginning with the rehearsal and ending with ceremony covered everything they needed to know from what to wear to the rehearsal and times they needed to be there to a checklist of what they needed to bring the day of the wedding. By sending this plan out, I was able to minimize my stress the night of the rehearsal and the actual wedding day, and I avoided having to answer repetitive questions.
  1. Speak Up. I have heard many brides complain after the fact that they didn’t like something a vendor/bridal party/family member did; or were disappointed by something a vendor/bridal party/ family member didn’t do. My rule is if you don’t say it or clarify it you cannot expect them to know what you wanted or didn’t want. Many brides fear being labeled a “Bridezilla” but if you hold back your wishes or don’t make sure everyone understands when things don’t go as planned you cannot blame anyone but yourself.

 

Have a Great Weekend,

Abigail R. C. McManus M.S Negotiation and Conflict Management

Apprentice

 

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SUMMER IS HERE! WHAT’S NEW WITH OUR RADIO PROGRAM?

Ann Margaret ZelenkaThe Texas Conflict Coach® radio program celebrated seven years in April providing community outreach and education about all topics about the everyday conflict in your life. We added this year the new Conflict Chat on the last Tuesday of each month to invite callers to discuss their conflict situations and to chew on disputes we hear about in the news, social media and our lives. Callers can talk with experts and get guidance on their issue.

We could not provide these services without the support of our volunteer guest hosts, graduate student interns, special guests and my Executive Assistant, Shawn Tebbetts. It is truly a team effort. We are growing our relationships with various universities to provide virtual internships. The interns learn about various areas of conflict resolution practice and where they can apply their skill sets based on their interests. Many interns have a passion to work with families or youth. Some have enjoyed the idea of providing negotiation skills to the workplace, and yet others in the legal arena or international affairs. Interns are responsible for researching topics of interest to the ordinary person and write weekly blog posts to help deal with certain situations. They are integral to producing quality programs by identifying radio topics and finding guests around the globe. Interns also get the opportunity to use social media to educate and engage, and to co-host radio programs during their term.

Joining us this summer and fall term is a new graduate student intern, Anne Margaret Zelenka from the University of Baltimore’s Master’s program in Negotiations and Conflict Management.

Here is a little bit more about Anne Margaret.

My name is Ann Margaret Zelenka, and I am completing a Master’s of Science degree in Conflict Negotiations and Conflict Management at the University of Baltimore in December 2016. I have been working as a federal intern for the U.S. government at several agencies as of recently. It is my hope to one day attend law school and become a federally-barred attorney, but I have many other interests including humanitarian and international affairs, intellectual property matters, private consulting, and others. I am trying to find my niche in this field, and it is my hope that this internship aids me in doing so.  A little bit more about me personally is that I like to crochet, sew, cook, sing, write poetry, read books, spend time with friends, travel, volunteer, and participate in self-improvement activities. I have studied abroad in Poland, the Philippines, Canada, and have spent time in Mexico as well. I am very involved in on-campus activities and currently hold several part-time jobs as a lab assistant, tutor, and personal assistant to an author. I volunteer for many outside organizations including my church and other places that are important to me.

Currently, I live with my family in Baltimore County, MD. I have one brother and two half-sisters, and my dad is still living. I married in 2015, and my husband is working in the pharmaceutical industry. About my childhood and young adulthood: I attended St. Thomas Aquinas Catholic School in Hampden, MD for pre-k, then a Christian school in Baltimore City, MD for kindergarten, and then I was homeschooled from 1st-9th grade by my mother, who recently died. I then went to Our Lady of Mt. Carmel Catholic High School for the remainder of my high school career, where I graduated 3rd in my class. I graduated with my Bachelor of Arts degree in Jurisprudence from the University of Baltimore, Magna Cum Laude and with other honors. 

We welcome, you, Ann Margaret Zelenka to our team!

Pattie Porter, LCSW, ABW

Founder and Host

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